Rebecca Dakin, Author at The Great British Sexpert - Rebecca Dakin - Page 25 of 35
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Author: Rebecca Dakin

So your dates a week away, do you call/text? And how often? It’s good to be aware of the vibe and your connection. Sometimes when people are so focused on what they want to say, or what to say next they miss the chemistry/connection or lack of it. When you are speaking focus on what the person is saying and how they are saying it, try and analyze their voice, how does it sound? Is conversation easy? Is it flowing or hard work? Does she sound, nervous, excitable, happy, friendly, bored, interested, pissed off (have you touched a nerve?), rushed (bad time?), non communicative?
30 June, 2012
Do you do the 3 day rule? Message her straight away? It’s a minefield! Lol no, seriously, if the connection is there you shouldn’t be playing games. I think to message someone within 24 hours of having their number, shows assertiveness and genuine interest. If that puts someone off, then chances are they are the game playing type, and is that what you really want? My girlfriends top ‘bug bears’ when people take their number is the text message, ‘is it ok to call?’ Or ‘when is it convenient to call?’ Guys think they are being considerate but actually they are being indecisive and it show lack of assertiveness.
28 June, 2012
Following my ‘5 Step formula for the perfect Dating Profile’, I will analyze two match.com profiles below. My 5 Step formula: 1)    Photos, smiling, clear 3 minimum – face, full body and action 2)    Introduction – opening gambit 3)    What you offer 4)    What you are looking for 5)    Invitation to connect
22 June, 2012
One of my recent blog posts I discussed how we can’t keep doing the same things and expect different results. So what’s holding YOU back? Is it confidence? If so what are YOU doing to build it? This could be lack of confidence due to lack of experience in the bedroom, lack of confidence due to not feeling good enough, lack of confidence because of fear of rejection…. The list is endless. Confidence is one of the main things I can help you with on a One to One Session, because it’s not your lack of experience in the bedroom, or not actually being good enough, it’s your perception that this is what makes YOU undesirable, not actually what others think of you. Here’s the thing if I met a guy who was inexperienced in bed I’d think ‘great!’ Someone I can teach to be an amazing lover! Who isn’t stuck in his ways and thinks he’s great in bed when he isn’t. There’s this misconception that people that have a lot of sex must be very good at it – wrong! ......
06 June, 2012
So with so many things at our fingertips nowadays at the touch of a button on our phones and technical gadgets; emails, calls, texts, the weather report, satellite navigation, video, tv – we have all as a nation become somewhat lazy. Many people do the same thing day in and day out and wonder why their life isn’t changing and they aren’t getting what they want out of it. If you are sitting there thinking that the man/woman of your dreams will magically appear if you keep on with your day-to-day life then you could wait your whole life and it never happen!
29 May, 2012
Last weeks Grazia magazine had an article about a couple (Mark and Kirsty) who only have sex 3 times a year because they are so stressed about their lack of money. I was deeply concerned at the reference that this is ‘normal’ for couples in there 30’s. Mark and Kirsty’s marriage is in complete crisis and they both seem oblivious. They seem content (in my opinion – naïve) with the fact that they assume that everything will be back on track once they have money. I understand and empathise that they have deep financial worries however it’s no excuse to lose their intimacy and connection. They still eat because they need to survive, they still look after their son, because he needs to survive too, but they also need intimacy for their relationship to survive so why have they let it go in times of such dire crisis? This is when it’s needed the most!....
25 May, 2012
So there's a girl sitting in a quiet bar on her own: The approach. Trust me if you go and plonk yourself down she will be cringing. I watched it happen the other day. This guy plonks himself opposite this attractive lady in a booth, sits directly opposite her ‘where are you from?’ She hadn’t finished her drink but she got up and left immediately. You might be thinking ‘how rude’ on her part. Let me explain… He had opened the door for her on the way into the pub, and because she was polite and said thank you he saw a green light that she was interested. This is not an IOI (indicator of interest) for conversation or anything else, it's just good manners. First thing to note is that this guy had clearly been in the pub for hours and was probably even irritating the bar man. A drunken man approaching a sober woman is never attractive. Second of all, it's likely she could be waiting for someone - maybe even a boyfriend. So a more subtle approach is needed to test the water......
22 May, 2012

Do you seem to always end up in relationships that make you unhappy but yet you carry on in them either hoping things get better, or because your esteem is low and you don’t want to be on your own, or because it’s easy to stay put where you are than to face up that it's not working and to end the relationship? If you resonate with any of this then deep down you think you don't deserve to be happy...

  The way to avoid this is to be aware of warning signs of incompatibility early on. You know those times when you feel really peed off about something your partner has said/done? Well most people ignore that niggly voice in their head that is saying ‘this isn’t right, he/she shouldn’t be treating/making me feel like this.’ This voice shouldn’t be ignored! It’s our sixth sense/our conscious/instinct. Generally if something doesn’t feel right - then it isn’t.
08 May, 2012
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