approach anxiety Archives - The Great British Sexpert - Rebecca Dakin
-1
archive,tag,tag-approach-anxiety,tag-76,theme-bridge,bridge-core-3.3.2,woocommerce-no-js,qode-optimizer-1.0.4,qode-page-transition-enabled,ajax_fade,page_not_loaded,,columns-4,qode-child-theme-ver-,qode-theme-ver-30.8.3,qode-theme-bridge,disabled_footer_top,qode_header_in_grid,wpb-js-composer js-comp-ver-8.0,vc_responsive

approach anxiety Tag

The other week I had an interview with Richard E Grant for a documentary for BBC Worldwide. Now you probably think that I’m uber confident, well I am in some situations and not in others – like many people. You might be able to speak to a boardroom full of people, but then not to a lady you spot in a bar that you like.
04 July, 2012

Today I wanted to share with you a lovely email I received from one of my coaching clients (with his consent of course :)

Hi Rebecca,

I just wanted to email you to say thank you for such an insightful first coaching session with you. You asked me to let you how I found you and any feedback I had after our session so here it is...

After performing an initial internet search and checking the usual avenues (match.com, eharmony) I was interested in some tutorship to hone my confidence and improve my communicative ability across the board, but especially when dealing with women.

I found your site and browsed around, watching some introductory videos and reading into the services on offer, I decided that I would test the water by requesting a skype conversation with you to see where it would take me.

It worked out very well, I have seen a great deal of benefit from the advice provided during the session and have even been able to put some tips into practise! I want to talk about what helped and why, and to generally summarise the feeling I had after our session.

The thing that struck me about the conversation was how relaxed I felt talking to you. You  put at ease from the get go and didn’t feel like I needed to hold back or mask my emotions. This comfort enabled me to reveal things that I wouldn’t usually speak of and therefore allowed me to start working on some personal issues that would change the way I approach a potential ‘love-interest’ scenario.

13 March, 2012

You may look at some guys and think ‘it’s all right for him he’s good looking/ funny/successful’ etc….

You can’t force humour you either have it or you don’t. With your looks you might not be the best looking guy, but that doesn’t matter either as long as you keep yourself groomed well and dress well. Success is relative. Everyone has different ideas of what success means – so this isn’t something you can measure, but women are attracted to men with goals and ambitions.

But what is it about YOU women like? What makes you stand out from other guys?

27 February, 2012
I don’t know how many of you watch The Apprentice? I know you guys in the US may not be familiar with the show, but I want to share a powerful technique that someone used on there to collect women as potential customers for a ‘beauticians task’. In a nutshell, (for those that don’t know), The Apprentice is a bunch of people that are split into two groups and given a business task. With their team they have to create a business and make the most money to win the task and get a reward. Bear with me on this… This particular task was they had to set up a beauty parlour. In a busy shopping center one of the guys had to find clientele for the beauty shop. Being a bloke he was very unenthusiastic about the task, until he found a really cool technique that he repeatedly used to draw women into the beauticians – thus making his team the most money. What’s this got to do with dating? I hear you thinking. Well let me explain what he did. He went up to women and said “put your little finger out”, which every woman did, and then he put his finger out and linked them together, he then led them silently by their finger to the shop. Why did this work? Let me explain -
09 February, 2012
I’ve had a couple of guys recently asking me about what to talk to women about to avoid the conversation going dry. Remember my last post highlighting that only 7% of our communication is through words? Conversation is really is not what anyone should be getting hung up on. Be careful not to talk too much. If you’re worried about conversation I would suggest it’s because you talk too much when you should be listening. Because if you’re listening you wouldn’t be worried about what to say! :) It’s one of the biggest mistakes men (and women) make; talking about themselves too much.
12 January, 2012
Guys do you recognize when you feel this way? Here’s what happens when you consciously or sub consciously think this about your girlfriend/wife/partner…   1)   you feel angry at her for no reason 2)   you say things to put her down and make her feel bad 3)   you don’t compliment her or say anything nice 4)   you feel jealous 5)   you feel insecure 6)   you start arguments about silly things 7)   you start being ‘difficult’ 8)   you feel moody and miserable 9)   you may be prone to drinking in excess 10) you start trying to control her, making it inconvenient/impossible for her to go out without you   Can you resonate with any of the behaviours above? Here’s some food for thought…
28 August, 2011

There's a video here of me being a guinea pig for Mr Ross Jeffries :) http://www.seduction.com/ In my earlier post I discussed sleazy men, and on this short video clip Ross Jeffries shows how to sexualise with words and touch without being sleazy using basic NLP mirroring...

23 August, 2011


1. Peacocking (wearing an outrageous prop eg; pink tie, bright green cowboy hat) works but you have to have the confidence to back it up. The hat wasn’t a strong peacocking prop because it was a dull colour and looked non descript if it was pink, then that would have been :) 2. His lack of confidence was the first thing I noticed and he needs to build that to be able to sarge (approach and 'pull' women) successfully. This can come in a number of ways, firstly I would do sessions with Dan to find out what he believes his value to be as a human being, so he can practice his DHV’s (demonstrating higher value). You have to believe that you have something to offer the opposite sex, and from Dan’s lack of confidence his attributes need nailing first, and he needs to be aware of them, before he goes out in the field. Then I would take him out to give him a make over... clothes/style/hair. You have to look the part, because if you look the part it’s easier to act the part and he will gain some confidence from a style change. 3. To start negging (back handed compliment - I don't like these but they can work) right at the start when you haven’t made a confident approach is a big no no. Women can sense when there’s no confidence behind words. If a guy approached me the way Dan did, I’d be off on the first neg, thinking he was a weirdo. 4. He sounded insincere, which is due to lack of confidence. The whole thing was really forced and it didn’t come naturally to him. I would work with him by getting him to think about men who he admired and respected and the reasons why. Then we would analyze their success with women, and see what he could learn from them.

29 June, 2011