February 2013 - The Great British Sexpert - Rebecca Dakin
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February 2013

Can I kiss you? You don’t ask you just do, when the mutual chemistry and desire is there. And if you get rejected - it’s her loss! This blog has been inspired by one of my girlfriends. She had been on a few dates with this guy and wasn’t sure if she fancied him but knew there was something there. He dropped a few hints about being invited in for coffee and eventually because he wasn’t sure how she felt he asked her if he could kiss her. This immediately killed the moment, and any spontaneity and made my friend feel uncomfortable. She mumbled a ‘no’ because she was so embarrassed, then he said, “Can I at least have a hug?” Awkward! She admitted that if he had been assertive enough to just go for it, she would have kissed him. To ask for permission means that you obviously don’t think it’s the right time. Guys you might think you’re coming across as ‘caring about her feelings’ and not wanting to ‘make her feel uncomfortable’ but it’s the opposite it makes someone feel uncomfortable and you come across as though you are unsure of yourself, unconfident, weak, fearful (of rejection); none of which are attractive to women.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2271888/ Dear readers, Wow I wasn’t expecting so many people to take the time to reply to my article. Thank you! I don't know where the 900 men came from but I guess it makes the article stand out! I have been on around that many dates, but most of my business was from regulars, so this isn't accurate. For those that have written kind messages of support and have emailed me privately, my thanks to you for having an open mind and not judging me. Many people are quick to judge, as we see here. However what I find of interest is the term prostitute. Have people considered that to put a value on sex is not shameful it is showing a level of self-respect. And that’s not to say that those that don’t charge for it don’t have that, but for those being promiscuous I think it’s pretty savvy to make money from sex and a hell of a lot safer! In The Girlfriend Experience I discuss how many girls and guys go out at a weekend get incredibly drunk and go to their home and sleep with a stranger, a choice they are making because they are intoxicated. This is incredibly dangerous. I used to tell my parents where I was, who I was with and when I would be back. I’d stay at hotels where people had to provide the hotel with a credit card to secure their stay. I’d be seen by security cameras and hotel staff going in and out of the hotel, yet drunken women leave their friends on a night out, don’t tell anyone where they are going and sleep with a random stranger and come morning they can’t remember if they had sex or not. I would have a civilized meal and drink with a gentleman and then have private time with them. So if you had to pick, who should feel shameful?