Dating Advice Do People Love or Hate you? Part 2

26 Mar Dating Advice Do People Love or Hate you? Part 2

Posted at 11:18h in Dating, Relationships - Sex - Intimacy, T.V. Dating - Relationships - Infidelity - Sex by Rebecca Dakin

This post was inspired by last weeks ‘First Dates’ #firstdates

Returning back to the one and only Mr Simon Cowell a guy that evokes strong feelings from everyone.

Too many people are obsessed by ‘being liked’, that they focus too much energy on seeking approval. These people end up unconsciously pushing people away.

A carefree attitude doesn’t mean that you are someone who doesn’t care. It’s having strength to have an opinion and own it even if it is different to everyone else’s and means that other people dislike you for it.

What one person deems as being helping someone, another can deem it being cruel. This is particularly true of Mr Cowell who on talent shows is brutally honest would consider that he is helping people by not giving them false hope. He makes no apologies for having a strong opinion and show business is notoriously brutal so he’s only helping them toughen up, because wannabe stars have to learn to take harsh criticism.

The fact that Simon rarely gives out compliments means that when he does they are incredibly powerful!

To be the person who always says something nice can come across as not genuine, and compliments are then expected, and they don’t have any meaning or impact.

So what has this got to do with dating I hear you ask?

It was last weeks First Dates that inspired me as I watched all these guys paying compliment after compliment to women. I was cringing!

What happens when you over do the compliments?

1) You put the woman at a higher value than yourself (which is highly detrimental to those guys lacking confidence)

2) She doubts your sincerity

3) It makes her feel uncomfortable

4) She loses respect for you

5) It blocks her feeling sexual attraction – hence you will probably end up in the dreaded ‘friend zone’

I am not saying don’t compliment women however one powerful compliment is enough and move on don’t dwell on it. For a woman to respect a man she needs to earn compliments!

A compliment immediately followed by a question to change the subject works really well i.e “you look stunning… what can I get you to drink?” The lady is basking in the compliment but then has to think about what she wants to drink. She’s secretly hoping and expecting that you’ll say more, but you don’t. What you will find is that the lady will then step up flirtation if she’s interested and unconsciously work to receive more compliments.

It might sound that I am suggesting game playing and I suppose I am, however in a very specific form. It’s the game of building sexual attraction and it’s powerful and fun. It creates a strong connection and bond.