What I take from Chris and Gwyneths ‘Concious Uncoupling’ is that they see divorce as the last option. The happiness of their marriage has been questionable for a few years now. They have clearly been working on trying to see if there is a way to stay together, and it seems they have exhausted all their options.
However people do change, we all change throughout our life, and we never stop changing.
Change is based on our life experiences and the company we keep. Our lives can take different paths and we can end up wanting different things.
If these things don’t gel with that of our partner and a compromise can’t be reached then separation is the only way. We all deserve to be happy as individuals because for children to be happy they need to see happy parents whether they are together or not.
They say that they are parents first and foremost and I have seen people already questioning the fact that they are breaking up.
You don’t have to be together as a couple to be great parents.
This old fashioned notion of ‘staying together for the kids’ just simply doesn’t wash anymore in a world where women are independent and have choice. Women no longer have to think as they did the generation previously ‘I’ve made my bed and now I have to lie in it’, because as women we are skilled and educated as well as being Mum’s.
My personal opinion that is it unhealthy to stay in a toxic marriage/relationship, and children are far less likely to go on to have successful relationships when their parents haven’t had a happy marriage. Parents who think they are putting on a front for their children need to know that the kids see right through any façade, because it’s the unconscious body language that gives the game away even if there is no arguing. Too many couples split around feelings of hatred, anger, resentment and jealousy, a split whilst these feelings are at the forefront is inevitably going to be more challenging and damaging for children. What Gwyneth and Chris are saying is that they are going to work just as hard as making this break up go smoothly whilst nurturing positive feelings and trying to ensure that they do the best for their children. I think it’s a fine example to set for those couples thinking of divorce.