Do we choose to let others control our happiness?

With the world cup in full swing I’ve been following the England games, and it occurred to me the other night that many people allow other people and things to control their well – being.

For example I watched people go through a number of strong emotions based on something that was out of their control, in this case a football match.

There were feelings of hope, happiness, excitement, elation, frustration, anger, disappointment; all evoked by a football match. Of course these are all feelings that we all experience however the negative emotions are a waste of energy in this instance, because the result was all down to the players.

When we lost the game the mood dramatically changed in the pub and some people were so pissed off that they went home!

I wonder how many wives or partners had to put up with a grumpy agitated man for the evening?

I heard the other day that domestic violence rises when the world cup is on, and that it doesn’t matter if England wins or loses! In fact when England played last Saturday night there were 13 rapes reported in Nottingham.  Whether the team wins or loses emotions are still running high, and testosterone levels are through the roof.

If we allow things outside of our control to drive our feelings and emotions then essentially we are giving our power away. Once we learn to put ourselves back in the driving seat we can focus our energy more positively, and by changing how we react to certain situations will make our lives and the lives of those around us happier.

 5 Tips to keep your emotions in check whilst the football season is on:

  1.  Remember that it is a game, and games are supposed to be fun. In the grand scheme of things how will it really affect your life if England don’t win the cup?
  2. Take time out to ground yourself. You can do this before during and after the game. Sit with your feet firmly on the ground, take a couple of deep long breaths, in through your nose and out through your mouth. Then focus on the feeling of your feet on the ground, then on two other different sensations – perhaps your hands on your lap or maybe the chair on your back, then find 3 things for each of your senses, 3 things you can see, 3 things you can hear and 3 things you can smell. You can do this discreetly and it will bring you into the present and clear your mind.
  3. Don’t allow yourself to get drawn in by others being negative around you.
  4. Take time after the game to relax and calm down in a positive environment
  5. Avoid watching the games with friends that get too emotionally involved. Those that perhaps aren’t big football fans will most likely to be less effected by the game. 

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