27 Feb Are you a Boring Date?

Everyone is a little bit selfish on some level and wants to know, “what’s in it for me?” Whether it is a job, friends or potential girlfriend/boyfriend. For a job it might be job satisfaction, good pay, a pleasant work environment. For friends it might be fun, support, social activities and social status.

When it comes to girl/boyfriends it’s the same. People think ‘how is this person going to fit in with my life? What can they offer me?’

Everyone is looking for different things and it’s about finding someone who fits in with your lifestyle and matches your values.

What do people see when they look at you? Are you interesting? Do you get on with your life, socialize, live life to the full and make things happen?

Or do you sit wait and make excuses? Because once you have a boy/girlfriend/get a new job, move house then you will be happy, go out, lose weight, socialize, cook healthy food etc…

The people who get on with their life regardless of whether they are in a relationship and find ways to entertain themselves and enjoy themselves are the people who will meet potential girl/boyfriends and have enough to talk about to be interesting and engaging.

The ‘waiters’ are not only boring and dull, but don’t show an attractive trait by giving the power to other people to make them happy and for them to live. They are the ones that will stay in a cycle of loneliness because they have nothing interesting to offer, nothing fun to talk about, because they don’t do anything!

I wrote about a dating profile on Match.com, someone worded his profile: ‘I don’t really know what to write here because all I do is work, eat, gym and sleep’. No Joke! Wow what a catch! Who wants to date someone whose live is so mundane?

Would you contact this guy or the guy who says, ‘I love the outdoors and going mountain biking with my friends at the weekend’?

How do You know if You are Boring?

1)   Apart from eat, sleep, work and the gym, do you have at least 3 social interests? This could be a social activity/hobby/interest or club

2)   Would you rather stay in and Social network with virtual friends than go out?

3)   Do you rarely get invited to social events?

4)   If you do get invited do you often feel like you can’t be bothered and/or make excuses?

5)   Do you have set meals on set days?

6)   Are your interests all mostly with the same gender or things you do alone? For example knitting, fishing, games workshops, X Box (these things are fine by the way as long as they’re mixed in with other interests)

7)   Does the thought of being spontaneous make you uneasy?

8)   Are you waiting for a boy/girlfriend before you socialize/lose weight etc..? This is a classic self-sabotage!

9)   When you go out do you tend to go to the same places?

10) Do you like your time out of work to be routine?

If you answered yes to two or more of the above then people probably perceive you as boring. If you want to change this perception, do something different!

My Dating Advive for today is;

Remember Einsten said; ‘Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results.’ If you are not happy in your life and relationships then do something different, get out there and explore what life has to offer. Live and cherish each moment that you are alive.

This will firstly help you with social skills, give you a sense of well being, second of all you will be interesting, you will have things to talk about and because you radiate positivity people will be attracted.

Who wants to date someone boring? Someone equally as boring!

So if you want to be with a fun/carefree/lively and positive person, first become that person. Once you can offer this you will attract like-minded people.

If you need a ‘rocket up you’re a*s’ to get out there, please do get in touch. Empowering and motivating people, is what I am passionate about.